As I read through the Old Testament, I've come to a conclusion... I would make a GREAT Israelite!So many times in my life God has proven his love and faithfulness to me over and over again and yet, I still question if He cares for me; I still try to figure things out on my own before turning to Him. Why do I do that?
Sometimes I find myself getting irritated with the Israelite people... seriously,when are they ever going to learn that God will provide for them, He will guide them and He loves them immensely?
But really, I do the same thing. I don't fret about food and water and I don't fear having to wandering through the desert for 40 years, but I do question God. I do wonder if I'll have enough money in the future to fix my ailing van even though God has provided for us time and again. I worry about if I'll be asked to return for the next school year as a preschool teacher aide even though I've clearly seen God provide employment for me when I needed it. I fret about how people view me even though He's given me amazing friends who constantly love and encourage me. Why do I tend to focus more keenly on the what ifs rather than rejoicing in what God has already done for me and trusting Him to provide and guide me for the future?
I don't like this character quality in my life and I talked to God about it this morning and I've come to a new conclusion... I'm thankful He is patient with me and He readily forgives my doubting and feelings of inadequacies just as He did with the grouchy, impatient, wishy washy minds of His Israelite children. My prayer is that with each new day I will get better at trusting Him for all my needs and become less dependent on me and my worry wort of a mind!
And my God will meet all your needs according to the riches of his glory in
Christ Jesus. (Philippians 4:19)
Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns,
and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than
they? (Matthew 6:26)
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